The Secret Life of Ashley
by ronaldbiliusweasley
Summary: Ashley, with the help of Griffin, makes a decision that changes her life. Adrian is in love with Ricky but he claims he cannot handle a serious relationship. When Amy and Ben break up, Ricky makes his move on Amy. Who will be together in the end?


Full summary:_ Tired of constantly being ignored by her family, Ashley Juergens, with her friend Griffin's help, makes a decision that not only changes her life but also the lives of the people around her. Adrian and Ricky take a break from their relationship, and when Amy and Ben break up Ricky makes his move on Amy, who is hurt but willing to begin a relationship with him. However, will Ricky be able to get over Adrian? And will Sophia, a girl from Ricky's past, change his mind about both Amy and Adrian when she comes to town with the most shocking secret of all? Meanwhile, Jack and Grace have broken up, and Ben asks Grace out on a date. With Ben and Grace dating, will Jack & Grace and Ben & Amy still have a chance? And what about Amy and Ricky's new relationship? Ashley's newfound "priority" puts her teenage years on hold, and problems emerge in the Juergens household, including financial difficulties and sibling rivalry.  
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_**The Secret Life of Ashley**_

_by: ronaldbiliusweasley_

Chapter 1: Somewhere Else

Ashley Juergens collapsed onto her bed and closed her eyes, wishing she were somewhere else, anywhere else. She soon drifted into a deep sleep.

_She was on a boat, way out in the middle of the Atlantic. The gentle waves rocked the boat back and forth, giving her a sensation she had never felt before and releasing some of the stress that had accumulated for the past few months._

_As the boat rocked back and forth Ashley smiled and walked to the front of the boat. She stood there for a moment, feeling the mist spray upon her face, feeling the steady rock of the boat. She kicked off her shoes and stood on the first of five guard bars. She managed to balance herself and threw her arms out._

_Strong muscular arms appeared parallel to hers, and he stepped up onto the bar with her. He laid his head on her shoulder and kissed her neck. Ashley smiled and rested her head against his. "I'm a bird," she said, lifting her head back up and staring out at the endless ocean. He chuckled. "Are you a bird?" she asked him, turning to look at him. "If you're a bird I'm a bird," he said, placing his lips on hers._

"ASHLEY!" Amy screamed for the tenth time. Ashley opened her eyes. She was laying on her back in the middle of the bed, her fingertips hanging over the edge. Her arms were out just like they had been in her dream, like a bird's wings.

"What the hell are you doing? I'm almost late for my date with Ben," said Amy, throwing John's diaper bag on Ashley's bed. Ashley used her arms to push herself up just as Amy thrust John into her hands. Ashley caught the poor boy just in time, as Amy had nearly threw him at her. John began to cry loudly in Ashley's arms. Amy sighed loudly, and turned, ready to leave the room.

"Where are you going?" said Ashley, trying to calm John down by sitting him on her leg and moving it up and down like John was on a horse. Amy turned back around. "Didn't you hear me? I said I'm going on a date with Ben," said Amy rudely, putting her hand on her hip and giving her sister a dirty look.

"Yes, but you didn't ask me if I'd watch John..." said Ashley, still trying to calm the small child down. "Look, Ashley, I'm under a lot of stress. I need to go out," said Amy. She was wearing a slimming, knee length black dress, and had a matching black purse to go with it. "Yes, but I have plans. I'm going somewhere with Griffin," said Ashley. Amy chuckled.

"Well, I think you've seen enough of Griffin this week. He's been over every night," said Amy, pointedly looking at Ashley's clock and sighing loudly. "Damnit, it's already 5 after 7. I'm late!" cried Amy. Ashley ignored her sister and continued. "Yes, because each night I was supposed to go out and do something you've asked me to watch John, and it's not as if mom or dad will help me watch him. They have Robbie. I needed some company," said Ashley as John finally stopped crying.

"Look Ashley, I need time for myself. I need to have a life," said Amy. "John is your life now Amy. You can still have Ben, but John is your number one priority, you know that," said Ashley. "Yes Ashley I know that!" cried Amy, exiting the room. "You can go out with Griffin some other time!" came Amy's voice from outside just before the slammed the door shut.

Ashley glared after her for a moment before setting John down on the floor and getting some of his toys for him to play with. She picked up her cell phone and dialed the house number. It took a few rings before someone picked up. "Hi dad, yes. Yeah. She did it again. Yes. Dad, I know she's under stress but she's done it to me every night this week! Yes I know. I know! Fine, goodbye," said Ashley, throwing her phone onto her bed.

She looked over at John. He was sitting and playing with some blocks, stacking them and then watching them tumble over. He laughed and clapped his hands together when this happened. Ashley smiled at her nephew and fell back onto her bed, fighting the wave of exhaustion that crept over her. Falling asleep with John in her room was not a good idea.

Ashley could feel her eyes shutting and wanted so badly to close them, to get back to that dream she was having and find out who the guy on the boat with her had been. Even as she managed to drift into an uneasy sleep, each time she turned to look and see who it was he had gone. His arms were no longer connected with hers, and the boat was empty except for her.

Someone was rubbing her arm gently. She was still on the boat, and expected to finally see his face, but once again she turned and no one was there. She still felt the somewhat rough hands on her arm though. She tried to pull her arm away, but she still felt it. "Ashley," said a familiar voice. Ashley jerked her head all around, trying to finally see who was there. Who the mysterious guy was. But there wasn't anyone.

"Ashley!" said the familiar voice again. Someone shook her body slightly, and her eyes finally started to open. She was looking into the face of Griffin, who was rubbing her arm gently. Ashley moved her head to look at the clock. It was almost 10:30, meaning she had been asleep for three hours. She had fallen asleep with John in her room. She jumped off the bed and looked all around for him. "Where is he?" she cried, looking under her bed.

"Relax, relax, I put John in his crib to sleep," he said, standing off the bed and pulling her into a hug. "I've been asleep for hours!" cried Ashley, releasing him.

"I came in at quarter after 7. You were passed out on your bed so I watched John for you," said Griffin, smiling at her. "I can't believe I fell asleep!" said Ashley, putting her hands on her head. "Hey don't worry about it. You have to be exhausted from watching him the past few nights, no one would blame you," said Griffin. "Yes, but he could've gotten out the door, he could've been kidnapped, all because I fell asleep!" she cried.

Griffin pulled her in for another hug. "Listen to me, you had every right to get a well-deserved nap. You're more of a mother to John than Amy is or ever will be," he said, rubbing her back. "I just can't deal with this anymore, Griffin. I can't take it," she said frustratedly. "Ashley, it's okay, it's okay," he said, squeezing her tighter in his arms.

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"I care! I told you I care!" cried Adrian. She had tried for months, no, she had tried for _years_ to make Ricky see how much she cared and how badly she wanted him. Nothing seemed to work. He was always running off with other girls and cheating on her, and Adrian didn't know how much of it she could take anymore. "No, Adrian, you don't care. If you cared you wouldn't be running off and sleeping with other guys," said Ricky, trying desperately to leave Adrian's house.

"I slept with those guys because I was depressed Ricky. I was depressed because you were sleeping with other girls," said Adrian, grabbing his arm to stop him from leaving.

"So get a damn tub of ice cream and sit and watch a sappy romance movie, but don't go have sex with other guys," said Ricky. Adrian chuckled. "No Ricky. I'm not the type of girl to do that. If I'm hurt I'll go out and do what I want when I want, no matter who it's with," said Adrian. "I think if we really loved each other we wouldn't sleep with other people," said Ricky, and he pushed past Adrian to get to the door. "RICKY!" Adrian cried, running after him.

Ricky opened the door and turned back to Adrian. "Look Adrian, you know that's true. If you truly loved me you wouldn't sleep with anyone else, and if I truly loved you I wouldn't sleep with anyone else," said Ricky. "But it's meaningless sex, Ricky, with all of those other guys and girls, it's meaningless," said Adrian, placing her hands on his chest, "It's not meaningless with us. When we have sex it means something. When we have sex I feel something that I never feel with any other guy."

Ricky listened to her words. He knew he felt the same, that having sex with her felt different than when he had sex with anyone else, but he knew he couldn't stop having sex. He wasn't ready to stop having sex. And Adrian refusing to have sex with him did not exactly make for a good relationship.

"I need time, time to figure out this mess that I'm caught up in, Adrian," he said. He looked down at her hands and pushed them off of him. "I have a son I need to worry about, not to mention Amy who's getting unbearable to be around, and then there's my job, and school. I don't have time to deal with this," he said, once again turning to leave.

Adrian's eyes moistened. "You mean you don't have time for me?" she asked. Ricky looked down. He could not look at her, not when the pain was etched so clearly on her face. "Adrian, I just...I need to figure my life out. I need time," he said.

"You've had time! Plenty of time to figure things out. God damnit Ricky! I know, okay? I know things seem really messed up lately. I know that you have a lot going on, what with Amy and John and everything else that's been happening to you, but you have to know that this is right! _Me and you are right. _We make sense. We can help eachother through it all, through everything."

Ricky tried desperately not to listen now. He'd cried too many times in front of Adrian and he wasn't about to do it again.

"We both have things going on, things that aren't good but things that I know we can get through together. I can't get through this without you Ricky, I can't. And I won't."

No matter how hard he tried he could not manage to let her words escape him. Each word she said entered his brain like a train crashing into the side of a tunnel: with so much impact it left him wishing for the end.

"And you know," she continued, stepping closer to him, her voice becoming firmer, "that you and me are going to end up together Ricky. You know we are. Just because you have a son with Amy doesn't mean you and her belong together, and you know that. You know as well as I that just because someone is your biological parent does not mean they need to be in your life forever!"

"That's the thing, Adrian. I want to be in John's life. I would never do to John what my dad did to me, or what your dad did to you. I need to be in his life. I love my son and I don't want to spend the rest of my life without him, wondering what he's doing or if he's calling someone else 'dad'. That's not what I want. I have to be with my son," said Ricky. The tears were coming, he could feel them rushing out of his eyes but hurriedly wiped away the beginnings of his tears so Adrian would not see. Adrian sighed and placed her hands on his chest again.

"I know, Ricky. I know you want to be in John's life. But...you have to realize that being a parent with someone doesn't mean you have to be with that person. Plenty of people in this world have children together and aren't married or even together at all and they're perfectly happy. I want to be happy with you, and only you. I couldn't go the rest of my life knowing that you're spending yours with some other girl, much less Amy!"

"Adrian, please!" Ricky said, shoving her hands away and walking swiftly out the door. "No, no, no, no, Ricky!" Adrian called, running after him across her small front lawn. Ricky tried walking quickly to his car but she caught up to him. "Please just listen to me!" cried Adrian. She was putting her heart on the line and he was walking away. She couldn't stand it, she couldn't take it anymore. She needed him to see how badly she needed to be with him.

"Don't just keep walking away when things get rough. I'm telling you, flat out, that I love you. That I want to spend the rest of my life with you...Ten years from now I want to wake up next to you, and I want our kids to run and jump on our bed on Christmas morning screaming that there are presents to unwrap, and I want you to sit there reading the paper while I fight hopelessly with our teenage daughter about a boy!" yelled Adrian.

"Adrian just stop it, alright? Those are childish dreams. You have to start living in reality!" yelled Ricky. "Wanting to be with you is a childish dream?" cried Adrian. By now there were people staring out their windows at the fighting pair.

"It is, Adrian, it is. I have a one year old son, whose mother hates my guts for getting her pregnant at 15 years old. I have a father in jail who will probably kill me if he can ever lay his hands on me again. I have a job at a butcher shop putting together meat baskets for Christ's sake and I live by myself and still manage to go to school. And now you're telling me you want a full time commitment, a relationship. It's not going to work that way!"

"So you have time to go have sex with a bunch of random girls but you don't have time to be in a relationship with me? Yeah, Ricky, I'd say that's real fucking fair!" cried Adrian. Neither Ricky nor Adrian could see, but Amy was now staring outside of the window, watching the pair fight as she prepared to leave the house to go meet Ben.

"Stop making every god damn thing about you, Adrian! Because not everything is about you. Put yourself in my shoes, and you'll see where I'm coming from," said Ricky, starting again for his car.

"Put myself in your shoes? Ha, that'd be great, wouldn't it? Me being the hopeless guy who can't even manage to stick with one girl!" cried Adrian. Ricky glared at her and got into his car before she could stop him. "Ricky!" Adrian cried, trying to get him to stop. He drove away before she could say anything else. Adrian frsutratedly walked back inside her house, wishing that for once she could get what she wanted.

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"Damn," he said, pulling away from her and licking his lips, taking in the sweet taste of her mouth. She smiled at him. "There's a lot more where that came from," she said, placing her lips on his again. He kissed her back enthusiastically, using his tongue to play with hers. She moaned slightly but pushed him away. "Okay, I have to go," she said, giving him another quick kiss.

"Come on Madison," said Jack, as Madison walked swiftly towards the door. Madison turned back around. "What? That wasn't enough for you?" she said, biting her lip. "Well, it was," said Jack, taking a look back at his messed up bed, "but..."

"But what?" asked Madison, raising her eyebrows. "I kind of want a little more," said Jack truthfully. He wanted nothing more than to have actual sex with her, not just oral sex. Not that he didn't like oral sex, but he wanted so much more with Madison it was unreal. "Jack Pappas you can wait, I have to get home. I'm not going to be at your beck and call for the rest of my life," she said. "Madison, I didn't mean it like that," said Jack. "I know why you're with me. I know you're only doing it to get back at Grace and make her jealous because she won't have sex with you anymore, and I'm okay with that. But I need a life too. I have other guys interested," she said, smiling happily.

Jack looked offended. "Wait a minute, are you telling me that you are having sex with other guys? asked Jack. Madison scoffed. "Oh, please, and you're not having sex with other girls," she said sarcastically. Jack looked dejected and looked down. "Exactly," muttered Madison, and with that she grabbed her coat off his doorknob and left the room, leaving Jack to think to himself.

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_A/N: All in all, I'd say this is a story mainly about drama. There is a lot of romance, but there is a lot more drama and depth behind the characters that will be explored. The story is mainly about Ashley, although there will obviously be a lot more about other characters as well. I love the character of Ashley, and I feel like her story has never really come into play on the show, and I want to explore her background and her thoughts and feelings towards the people in her life rather than just sticking with the constant drama with Amy.  
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_Also I know this chapter was short, but its mainly to show some of the key elements that are happening in the story. Ben was not in this chapter, but he will be in the next, as well as John, George, Anne, Robbie, and many others. I'm trying to stick somewhat to the show, but sometimes it is hard as I have my own visions for each of the characters, so sorry if some of them seem a bit off character at times. _

_As I said before, Ashley is the key character in this story. Many of the actions of the other characters are based off of what happens to her and what she does, as what she does affects Amy and what Amy does affects Ben and Ricky and so on..._

_One thing I wanted to say, which I feel like I have to get out now, is that I know a lot of people are going to read this story for Ashley, and I get that. But I felt that just including Ashley's story would completely take away from the story, and it would also take away from the character development I want to show. Ashley is by far my most favorite character on the show. Although I dislike how she acted around Grant (and I seriously hope she does nothing with Ricky in the upcoming season) I still think there is a lot about her we don't know. So yes the story will focus mainly on her, but as my notes for the story are now I'd say that a lot of drama also involves Griffin, Amy, Ben, Ricky, Adrian, Jack, Grace, Madison, Anne, George, Cindy, and Leo. So don't get discouraged if Ashley only has a small bit in a certain chapter. She is prominent and will be the main character and have the most "screen time". Definitely the next most prominent character would have to be either Griffin or Amy. Ben, Adrian, and Ricky share about the same amount of time and the rest of the characters have a bit less. I chose my favorite characters to have the most of the screen time. Not saying that Grace and Jack aren't good characters, but I honestly hate Jack (and I don't think he's attractive either!).  
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_Also, I already know who will be together in the end. No matter how many reviews I get stating that I'm writing the story wrong or "he should be with her, not her!" it won't matter. I'm sticking to my story and I know which couples are endgame. So please do not send me any reviews or messages asking for a couple to end up together.  
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_Anyways, that was the first chapter. The next should be posted sometime next week as now that summer has started I'll be home a lot more to update my stories! Thanks and please leave nice reviews!  
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